


Don't Throw Away Your (One) Shots!

by frechi123, Hamino (frechi123)



Series: One Shots with the Revelationaries [2]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Adrienne's last name is Anton, Dolley's last name is Payne, F/F, F/M, Gen, M/M, Maria's last name is Lewis, Most of the minor characters are their own people, Multi, References my other stories, Some stories continue, The children are usually fostered not by their parents, Theodosia's last name is Prevost
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-01
Updated: 2019-01-10
Packaged: 2019-05-24 09:14:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14951847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frechi123/pseuds/frechi123, https://archiveofourown.org/users/frechi123/pseuds/Hamino
Summary: Ready for more mini one shots with our #Revelationary squad and friends? Let's go!





	1. Curlers

**Author's Note:**

> Most of the shots will reference the custom modern lives I've made up for them; a few might be "historically" canon.
> 
> Feel free to throw some ideas out there :)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a certain prank is pulled, and the Hamilsquad must move door to door to save some unruly curly hair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No outright romance here :)
> 
> This is the same universe as "Wake Us Up To The Next Life" and the Tunnelsquad series.

In the house of G-Wash, trouble was brewing...

"Dude, who hid the curlers again?!" John yelled as he ran out of his room in his PJs and his hair flat on his head. He raced over to the master bathroom and started pulling at his hair, which was totally bothering him.

Once again, the nine sets of curlers belonging to the curly-haired patrons of the house had mysteriously gone missing. And, as usual, when there was a problem to be solved, Martha and George were nowhere around.

Hercules and Theodosia poked their heads out from the bathroom entryway, clearly suffering the same problem. They both walked out into the cross hall connecting bathrooms to bedrooms. "You aren't the only one worrying about their hair here, John!" said Theo, pointing at her head, exasperated.

A shriek came from upstairs. All three of them shook their heads slowly as they turned towards them.

"We know, Thomas," said Herc, as the man in question sprinted down the hallway stairs with James in tow. "We all have Curler Deficiency Syndrome going on around here."

Right when Thomas was about to answer to that, three loud knocks came at the main door, as if on cue. "Open the door!" called a distinct voice. Maria.

"Join the club, Maria," John said, when James let her in, as she stormed in carrying her empty curler case.

Maria stomped her foot on the ground. "I want to know who thinks this was a good idea. We have to give them a piece of our mind."

All six of them marched out through Aaron's room back to the living room. They found Aaron, Alexander, Peggy, and Angelica there, playing a game. Angelica's hair was as straight and flat as the rest of the afflicted. Peggy's, however, was messily curled up by various old kitchen spoons. The quartet looked up in curiosity at the remaining six entering the room.

"Uh oh, someone hide all the curlers again?" asked Alex.

John rolled his eyes. "No, Alex, straight hair is the new thing between us curly tips."

"Now is not the time for your sarcastic quip," said Aaron, standing up. "And no, Alex and I didn't take the curlers. We know how you guys are about your hair."

"We asked Charles and Sam, they swore they didn't take them," Peggy added, twisting a spoon further into her hair. "And obviously if Eliza did it, Angelica and I would know. She's not exactly the best liar."

"Are you talking about me again?" Eliza poked her head into the main entryway. Charles and Samuel popped up behind her, and Lafayette, who appeared severely distressed, eventually showed up behind them.

Herc chuckled. "Now if you only had a sense as strong for stolen curlers as you do when you're being talked about. It would be a thing of the past."

"Oh my gosh, did someone actually ransack the curlers again??" Sam asked in exasperation. "Well, it's not any of us that are here now or this problem would have been long over."

"But who else knows where those curlers are besides the fourteen of us in this house?" Theo pointed out. "Martha doesn't curl her hair, and George doesn't need them."

"Perhaps one of our other friends is pulling a prank on us then?" Angelica suggested. "Remember that party we threw last week? Nearly all of our friends and acquaintances were there."

Laf tapped his chin in thought, then snapped his fingers. "We should go investigate Benjamin and Jonathan first. They are over here the most, yes?"

*****

"What happened?" asked Jon, when he cracked open his front door to his friends (and three block away neighbors) standing outside. His own hair was standing up on his head instead of tied into his usual ponytail. "Did you forget to curl your hair this morning?"

"We didn't forget," Peggy said, taking a spoon out and shaking it. "Someone stole our curlers from our secret hiding area. You and Ben weren't in our cross hall again, were you?"

Jon said, "I wasn't there, I don't typically wander around your house unless one of you is following me. I was in your kitchen when that party happened, with Paine, Tench, and Adri. We were just messing around and singing into spoons and stuff. I don't know where Ben was during that, though... Want me to ask him?"

"We'd appreciate it, yeah," James said.

Jon turned into the house and called out, "Hey, Ben! Come over here a sec!"

Moments later, Ben, whose hair was also stuck stiff up in the air, despite its shortness, dragged himself over with his hands over his head. "Not so loudly, geez! I have a headache!"

"Are you hungover?!" Jon whisper-shouted.

"So what if I am? Are you my mom now?"

Alex frowned. "But we didn't have any alcohol at the party... did you sneak some in there?! You know how George and Martha get about that!"

Ben said, "it wasn't me, it was Wilkinson. He and Martha Manning were having a drinking contest in the office and they made me join in. I would have said no except they have leverage on me, so I try to stay on their good side." He reached into his hair and pulled out two sets of curlers. "They entwined these into my head and I couldn't get them out since until now. Jon had to help me get them loose."

"You do the craziest things," said Thomas. He took the curlers from Ben. "These are John's and Theo's." He handed them back to the respective people. "Okay, so that's two. We have seven curler sets left to go."

"What happened to _your_ hair?" Eliza asked, gesturing to Ben and Jon's heads. They sighed.

Jon was the one to answer. "Oh, Tench and Marshall are holding our straightner and all our combs hostage. Apparently they think we look hilarious when our hair looks like wildfire."

"Then we will go to Tench, Marshall, and Wilkinson's next," Laf said. "They are on thin ice with all of us now, oui?"

*****

The first thing the trio did when everyone rolled up at their door was laugh for 10 minutes straight while sixteen sets of eyes glared at them until they were done. Had this not been the circumstances they were in, they might have laughed. Ben and Jon's hair was, of course, stuck up like wildfire, John and Theo were curling theirs on the go, Alex, Eliza, Charles and Sam were slowly getting bed-head, Aaron was wearing one of his wacky hats on his head, and Thomas, Maria, Angelica, Peggy, James, Laf and Herc were still rocking flat head. Granted, they felt a bit better at Wilkinson holding his head in pain. He seemed to have drank more than Ben, given his expression.

"Shut up!" yelled a voice from behind the trio. Everyone looked over and saw a half naked Martha standing there, one hand on her head and the other one on her hip. Her hair was hidden under a non-transparent shower cap. "Why are you people so loud?!"

"What are you doing here, Martha?" asked Laf, as she appeared beside them. "Do you not have a house of your own to go to?"

Martha rolled her eyes. "Yes, I do, Gilbert," she snapped, "but they — " she gestured to Tench, Marshall, and Wilkinson — "were my ride and were too lazy to go the extra mile it took to get to my house, so here I am."

"Moving on," said John, "why don't you give Ben and Jon back their stuff while you're at it? And then give us our curlers as well. We're pretty sure you're holding some of them hostage."

"Wow," said Wilkinson sarcastically, "a smart cookie, this one is." He disappeared from the doorway a moment, returning moments later with Ben and Jon's missing stuff. "It was worth it for how ridiculous you both ended up looking." He handed the stuff to them.

Ben rolled his eyes. "Ha ha. Give them their curlers now."

"Oh,  _we_ don't have them," said Marshall. pointing at Tench, Wilkinson, and himself. "Take it up with  _her_." He jerked a thumb at Martha.

She scowled. "Do your girl dirty, why not," she muttered, but relented. "Fine. I think they're done anyway." She removed her cap to reveal curlers in her usually crimpy hair. "I would have given them back. Just wanted a new hairstyle," she explained as she took them down.

"It really wouldn't have killed you to ask, would it?" said Peggy, as Martha handed her three sets of curlers. "But thanks." She studies them. "Okay, mine are here - and Angelica's and Herc's too." She tosses the other curlers to the respective people. "Alright, we're done here. Let's move on, guys."

*****

"Why are we going to Adrienne's house?" Laf asked. He and Maria had split up the kitchen spoons between each other and were now wearing them.

"Because a little birdie told me that she lost her curlers the other day," Alex explained, "and has suddenly obtained a new set after our little party. Coincidence? I think not."

Laf scratched his head. "Could we not go to Paine's? Maybe she is throwing him under the bus again."

"She's not that bad," said James. "And, unfortunately, you can't avoid her forever. Even if she is a bit odd."

"A bit odd?? She has a  _shrine_ to me in nearly every room of her house! Her obsession is out of control!"

Eliza squinted. "And why do you know that?"

"Because she has told me.  _And_ has dragged me through every room of her house. She is not exactly the most - how you say - discreet person in the world," Laf answered with his arms crossed.

"Just let us look," said Thomas. "Besides, we're all here. We promise to intervene if things get super weird."

Moments later, the squad showed up in front of the door. Thomas rang the doorbell and Laf ducked behind Herc and Angelica. When the door swung open, Adrienne stood tall, wearing her silk robe and curlers in her hair. She narrowed her eyes at them.

"Why are you here? Are you going to accuse me of taking curlers too?"

"Uh, it's not an accusation if it's true?" said John. "And how did you know that's what we were going to ask?"

She shrugged. "Martha. And besides, I was with Paine, Tench and Jon the whole time."

"No, you weren't," Jon cut in. "You left after a couple of hours because you were bored. Besides, you never recover anything you lose so fast unless you steal it."

"It's funny how you thought that none of us would be able to recognize Laf's curlers in your hair," Thomas added, rolling his eyes, "or how predictable it would be that  _you_ would have stolen them."

Adri sneered. "Are you not smart. Well, what a pity he is not here to get them himself. Too bad, so sad."

Her face twisted in surprise when Laf then popped up from where he was ducked down the whole time. He narrowed his eyes at her and said, "I do not care that you are a girl, Adrienne - nothing else will stop me from tearing those curlers from your hair if you do not surrender them to me right now."

*****

"If that did not make Adri take down those shrines of me in her house then she is truly far gone," he said later, when the curlers had now found their way into his hair. John and Theo's were long done and so they took them down, while Angelica, Herc, and Peggy had more time to wait on theirs. Thomas, James, and Maria still had their hair stuck flat down, and, due to the hot weather of today, it was starting to frizz. Between the three frizzing ones, they carried the discarded kitchen spoons.

Maria took her hair up in a frizzing ponytail. "Okay, so we managed to rescue six curler sets," she said. "Only three left to go. And I hope we find them fast, 'cause it's starting to frizz up here."

Thomas said, "Who else do we know that might play a prank on us? John Jay? Herc, can I borrow your beanie, please?" He waited a sec for Herc to toss the beanie to him. He pulled it on over his head. "Thank you. Now, any other ideas? I was just throwing Jay out there as an example."

"Definitely not him," said James, tying Theo's bandana on his head. "He's too lazy to do anything. I'm pretty sure Alex and I caught him sleeping on the couch nearly the whole time at the party."

Alex hummed in agreement. "What about Monty?"

"Richard does not do anything like that without pressure from others," Laf said. "Frances?"

John made a face. "I don't think he cares to own anything besides a brush."

Suddenly, they heard whistling, and everyone turned and saw Paine strolling by. His hands were in his jacket pockets, and as he passed near, they could hear some irregular jingling sounds in there.

"Yo, Paine!" Angelica called when he'd gotten a considerable distance away.

He turned back and tilted his head. "What do you Revs want? I'm kinda late for something."

"When do you care about being on time for things?" Theo countered. 

Paine threw his hands up, as in surrender, but as he did, something went flying out of his pocket due to how quickly and roughly he'd pulled them out. 

"Hey!" James said, when he realized what the items were: his and Maria's curlers. "What are you doing with those?!"

"And how did you even get them?" Jon asked in confusion. "You were with me and Tench all night."

Paine shrugged. "Adri gave them to me before I left. Said I should hold onto them until she could make the delivery to them."

"Who's 'them'?" asked Ben, adding airquotes. 

"Dunno. No one will tell me. Well, take them. I'd rather not be on thin ice with any of you. You didn't deserve this." He gave them a small wave and smile before walking off.

"At least he wasn't crabby about it like the girls were," said James, untying the bandana, handing it to Theo, and putting his curlers into his hair. Maria did the same. Angelica, Herc, and Peggy took theirs down.

"Now we have to find  _my_ curlers," said Thomas, making an annoyed face. "But who the hell is left that would have them?" His face suddenly became one of realization. "Uh oh."

Eliza turned to him. "What-oh?"

"I... think I have an idea of who's got them. And that they may be the 'them' T.P. was talking about."

Peggy, Maria, and Herc suddenly realized who Thomas was referring to. "Eliza, remember? Back at King's?"

Eliza gasped. "Uh oh."

All the rest of us stared, dumbfounded. "Uh, are you going to tell us who has them, or...?" said Angelica.

*****

"Ugh,  _them_?!" said Alexander. "We should have come to these morons first."

The Revs were standing outside the house of America and James Reynolds. They were the only ones that _all_ of them were not on friendly terms with in the slightest; mainly for the harrassment of Eliza, Thomas, Peggy, Maria, and Herc back in their college days. How they even got into their party, they'd never know.

"Those curlers were  _imported_ ," hissed Thomas. "I don't want their weave anywhere over them." He was very serious about anyone touching them. He only allowed people in the house to touch them, but a few of them he didn't trust to do it alone (i.e. Alex, Peggy, Charles).

After 5 minutes of straight banging, the door swung open and there they stood, their hair oddly curler-free.

"Any reason you people are here?" America snapped. "We have better things to be doing then conversing with the likes of you."

Sam rolled his eyes. "Like what, stealing curlers?"

"We don't know what you mean," said James. "We don't have any of your curlers."

Eliza said, "we didn't say that you had  _our_ curlers."

James bit his lip and America glared at him. Thomas held his out expectantly. "Hand them over," he snapped.

"Make us," America said with a wicked smile.

That did it. Thomas plowed right into the house, knocking J.R. and America over and slamming their front door against the wall. Herc and Laf grabbed them before they could go and stop Thomas, who was overturning nearly everything in his fit of rage.

James and Eliza ran inside after him, helping him to look. The rest of them walked inside calmly, watching the whole show with looks of amusement. Theo and Alexander ran up stairs to assist in the search, and only a few moments later did a triumphant yell come from them.

"You found them!" Thomas cried out as Theo and Alexander each held three curlers in their hands. "Thanks, guys!" They handed them off to Thomas and he gladly tossed Herc's beanie back to him as he turned the curlers in his hair. Laf and Herc dropped James and America to the ground and followed everyone else out.

*****

"It's official: the basement is off-limits to our party-goers, agreed?" said John, when he placed the curlers in the drawers that faced the wall.

Everyone else nodded. "Agreed."

"Hey, keep it down!" All sixteen startled and faced the couch, where a tired Conway stuck his head out of the mound of blankets. All of them just stared at him as he said, "Uh, did I miss something?"

Eliza face-palmed. "Starting now."


	2. Ouija Terror

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ouija boards are terrifying enough without also being a reincarnate that has angered very old souls.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No romance here! But I promise I will attempt to incorporate some :)
> 
> This universe is not the same as Chapter 1, but they are still reincarnated. Here, Maria doesn't really like them and Alex is the only one under G-Wash's roof.

"Who's ready for game night?!" Alexander said, grinning ear to ear, to his friends at his front door.

Aaron, Eliza, and John were standing outside, carrying their usual things: Aaron brought the snacks, Eliza brought the sleepover stuff and John brought the movies for much later. Alex always provided the games whether they were at his house or not, but they were here more often than not for their game night, once every other week.

"What's on the agenda?" John asked as he followed Aaron and Eliza in.

"Well, tonight I've decided to make this Random Game Night," replied Alex, pointing towards his basement, "so we are heading on down to Game Grotto to see what we are playing."

The basement was known for being the hangout for most things Alex and his friends were doing, so over the years chairs, tables, and bookshelves were added until it looked akin to a mini library.

John and Aaron ducked to avoid the low pipe that hung down from the ceiling (they always joked about it being there since immemorial). Eliza and Alex were shorter than them, so they didn't have to duck. Everyone spread out looking for favorite games of theirs to play.

"Where are George and Martha again?" asked Eliza, pulling out Life from out under her favorite chair: with her old hand made throw pillow she donated to it.

"Out to dinner with your dad. Apparently they have business to discuss," Alex replied, trying to reach Chutes and Ladders off a tall bookshelf - with a ladder. It could be said that Alex more or less took care of himself by the time he was 14 (he was fostered at 8, and he was 16 now), when George and Martha deemed him old enough to stay home by himself when they went out for meetings. Before that, they'd either take the calls from home or drop him off at Phillip's, if he wasn't busy as well, to hang out with the Schuyler sisters.

"What are your sisters doing?" Alex asked. Eliza waved a hand. "Fashion show thing they usually do with Laf, Herc, and Maria. They usually ask me to join, but I prefer getting my game on with you guys."

Aaron held up some jacks in his hand. "Man, you sure have a lot of games down here."

"Ha, well, the older ones are George's and Martha's from back in their youth," Alex explained, climbing down, "but yeah, most of them are mine. I'm not the Gamemaster for nothing."

Aaron and Eliza both snickered. Then all three of them realized something. John had been awfully quiet this whole time...

"Hey, John!" Alex shouted. "Where you at?!"

"Here!" John popped up from behind the old sensible couch. He looked intrigued. "Guess what I just found!"

Aaron raised an eyebrow and tilted his head. "What, that meatball sub Wilkinson stole and hid from you last week?"

"No." John made a face. "Why do we keep inviting him over anyway? Besides, Peggy found that a few days ago and used it for her science project."

"Gross! Why??" This time Eliza made a face.

John shrugged. "Mold spores, I'm guessing. This is much weirder."

"Would you just tell us what's got you so curious?" Alex asked. John gave him a wicked grin, and held up a box containing a game.

Alex shrieked. " _Put that thing away, are you insane?!_ " He dove behind the bookshelf jutting out from the wall.

"Jesus Christ, Alex, what's the matter with you?!" Aaron asked. "Why are you flipping out over a game?!"

He looked up and pointed at it with an accusing finger. " _That abomination_ ," he hissed, "is  _not_ a game. It's a life-ruiner, and that's why George and Martha made me swear not to touch it again!"

"Ouija boards are not real, Alex," said Eliza. "Besides, if it's so dangerous, why didn't they get rid of it?"

"So no one  _else_ would find it? Duh!" He managed to stand and stomped over to the sensible couch and fell into it. Then he looked up at John, who was still standing behind it. Then he glanced at Aaron and Eliza in front of him. All three of them just stared before he spoke again. "If you insist on playing it, fine. But I want _no_  part of it."

*****

"Are those really necessary?" Alex asked, gesturing to the cloths that his friends were wearing on their heads. "Are you trying to concoct a séance or become fortune tellers?"

They were in the kitchen, and Alex was propped up on the island, with his friends on the floor below him. Aaron rolled his eyes. John said, "yes, they are necessary. Haven't you seen  _My Babysitter's a Vampire_?"

"You watch that? Seriously?" Alex shook his head. "And shouldn't that be a warning  _not_ to do it? The babysitter turned into a demon." Everyone stared at him. "I get bored easily," he said with a shrug.

"Yeah, yeah, the hypocrisy is strong with this one," Eliza said, waving a hand in dismissal. "So how do we start this thing?"

John held up two fingers. "Two fingers on the board, guys."

"You're making a mistake," said Alex as his friends put their fingers on the board.

Eliza shook her head in disbelief. "You're more freaked out than Will is on literally everything." Then she looked back at the board. "Okay, what now?"

"A: we can never play alone. Got it?" John asked. Eliza and Aaron nodded. "Okay, B: we have to be  _very_ specific of who we're summoning here, or we'll 'release' some unwanted 'demons' or whatever." All the players laughed at this and Alex jumped off the island, choosing to hide behind it instead. "And C: remember we have to 'dismiss' these spirits. And we can't take our fingers off the board until we do."

Alex peered over from behind the island. "You really are obsessed with that show, aren't you?" He didn't point out that those had been the rules George and Martha had given him when he played it himself.

"Zip it," John said, and Alex disappeared again. "Uh, who wants to start?"

"I will!" said Eliza. She stared down at the glass zone in the middle of the board, trying to concentrate. Then she thought of it. "Are there any fellow reincarnates that didn't live this life out long that wish to speak with us?" She shrugged when Aaron and John gave her funny looks.

The area in the middle glowed green with the word "Yes" appearing in wispy text. Aaron was secretly terrified while Eliza and John were pleasantly surprised. Alex already knew those feelings: it was what George, Martha, and himself had felt when they first picked it up...

"It could be a coincidence..." John murmured. "Try asking a non yes-or-no question and see if it has an answer or not."

"What is your name?" Eliza asked it. The midsection was now blue, and letters slowly moved into the area until two words were formed:  _George Eacker_.

Eliza scratched her head. "Who's George Eacker?" she whispered to her boardmates. They shrugged; they had no clue either.

"He's the one who shot Phillip all that time back," Alex muttered bitterly.

"Gee," Eliza said, trying not to yell at Alex for withholding that information from her all that time ago (" _Who did this? Alexander, did you know?!_ "), "you must see Philip Hamilton all the time, huh?"

Shockingly, the cirle turned red and the word "No" appeared.

"Isn't he with you... where you are?" she continued, confused yet cautious of not saying "up there" or "down there". She did not want to make assumptions.

George showed:  _Eliza, this realm where I am is only for the dead._

Of course Eliza was surprised that George knew her name as she did not tell him, but there was another realization to be made.

"Wait," Aaron said suddenly. "Does this mean young Philip is  _alive_?"

Green. So yes, that's what it meant. Eliza almost threw her hands up in joy except she had to keep one on the board.

Over the hour. Aaron and Eliza kept asking questions, including where the ghost realm was ( _Apologies. We are not allowed to say_ ), cause of death ( _Shot. Ironic, huh?_ ), how he was getting along ( _I've been better..._ ), stuff like that. During that, John kept glancing back at the island, where Alex had initially been shooting skeptical looks at all three of them before he gave way to sleep.

"Farewell, George Eacker. You are being dismissed," Eliza concluded. The circle went blue saying "Bye" and then went dark. All recipients took their hands away.

"Hey, no fair," John said, pouting. "I didn't get to talk to him."

Eliza stood and put her cover on the counter. "Next round, John, don't worry. I wonder who else is out there with him."

"We'll have to find out later, I suppose," Aaron said, putting his cover beside Eliza's. "Let's watch a movie and then we'll go another round." He walked over to the island to the sleeping Alex, propped up against a bar chair. "Come on, Alex, we're picking movies now."

He opened his eyes. "Nothing with ghosts. Not really in the mood."

Eliza and Aaron pulled him to his feet. "Fair enough," Aaron said, and Eliza added, "Away we go, then."

"I'll clean up the game," John said, albeit a bit distantly. He still hadn't removed his cover. Alex gave him a look before following Aaron and Eliza out.

As soon as they were gone, he put his fingers back on the board and asked, "Hey! Is anyone out there?"

Suddenly, the board shook and the ground rumbled. He heard shrieks and breaking glass coming from somewhere. He made a horrified face and jumped back, realizing he broke two rules... in the process breaking the last one.

"What did you do?!" He whipped around. Alex was standing at the kitchen entryway. "Why are you trying to play alone?!"

John didn't say anything. What would he say?

"Make it stop!" cried Aaron, who came crawling in later. Glass shards were injected into his leg. Eliza came running in after him, carrying gauze.

"What the heck?!" she screamed, looking at the board flashing symbols and letting multicolored wisps out. "What's going on?!"

Alex snapped, "John played alone and now unwanted souls are flying out of the board!" As he said that, he ducked to avoid being hit by an island chair.

Eliza fell back as the fridge doors started swinging and knocked her over. Holding her nose, she inched her way over to the boys. "Quick, put your fingers back on the board! Maybe it will help!"

All of them, even Alex, put their fingers back, and everything fell calmly or stopped moving out of its own accord.

"Whew," said Aaron, "glad that's over."

Alex shook his head. "It's not over yet."

The board was flashing white now and all four of them looked down. Black letters swam across until they formed two words... "Hands Off".

"Off what?" John made a face. "The board?"

Green, the board flashed.

"Wait!" Alex cried. but it was too late. John and Aaron moved their fingers. Eliza still held hers.

"Why would you do that?!" she said, as something else flew out. "They were trying to trick you, obviously!"

Aaron looked sheepish and John looked annoyed. Alex, on the other hand, was absolutely terrified. "Not again," he moaned. "Not again..."

"Not what again?" John asked. 

"I told you," said Alex, "angry spirits don't mess around. It's worse that we're all reincarnates, so some of this stuff could really badly hit home."

John shook his head in disbelief. "What are you talking about?" He yelped when a wisp of spirit suddenly started orbiting him like a planet, causing him pain as it went. The others scooted back.

"Hey! What's the big idea?!" It stopped spinning and came out in front in a humanoid wisp form to face him. John's eyes widened in terror and recognition. He saw a wispy gun in the man's hand, and a bullet hole in the side. He couldn't move, even as the man raised the gun to his side.

"Payback, Laurens," the former Charles Lee hissed cryptically, "it's payback time."

He pulled the trigger.

John screamed. Searing pain came through his side.

Alex and Eliza ran over to him to see how badly he was hurt. Aaron remained incapacitated.

"There is no blood, no wound," said Charles Wisp. "Just pain. Like what he caused me." He tuned from John to Alex. "Hmph. I thought you would have learned from the last time not to mess with things you don't understand."

Alex scowled. " _I_ wanted nothing to do with this, never again, Lee."

John groaned. "Can you - you please save the 'I t-told you so' for later?!"

"It's going to be a lot harder sending us all back now, seeing as your beloved parents are out. And we'll make sure it stays that way." Wisp Lee whispered into the fog and two wisps came flying at him. "Find the Washingtons. Keep them occupied until our work is done here." The wisps flew out and then he turned back to them. "Ready to play? Let's play." He laughed evilly and phased through the ceiling.

"Alex," Aaron said, when he could finally get to a sitting position to allow Eliza to remove the glass from him, "what did he mean by their work? What is it? And how does it get done?"

Eliza looked up from his leg where she had been wrapping it. "And why do George and Martha have to not be home?"

"What happened when you played this game?" John asked, jolting out due to the sudden halt of pain.

Alex sighed, and walked into the living room, where the chandelier was shattered and still flying. He gestured to the couch and his friends took a seat as he stood in front of them.

"It was 2 years ago, a month into our little routine, in October," said Alex. "I was determined to up the ante from two weeks earlier..."

***

_"George!" Alex called out from behind the sensible couch. The man in question was coming down the stairs. "Do you have any super cool games down here?"_

_George chuckled. "What do you mean, son?"_

_Alex said, "the last game night was pretty cool, but I want to top it! Besides, Halloween is coming up soon! I want to find something terrifying."_

_He dug around for a bit until he looked up and saw a game on the bottom shelf. "Hey! What's this?" he asked, bringing the game off the shelf. Ouija Terror._

_George made a strange face. "Uh, are you sure about this one?"_

_"Yeah!" Alex's eyes lit up. "Can we play it? Please?"_

_The man bit his lip. How could he say no?_

_Even if he knew what he was getting into._

_***_

_"George!" Martha cried out. "You know the consequences of playing this game!"_

_They were in the kitchen. Alex was waiting excitedly out in the living room and they were speaking in hushed tones._

_"Yes, Martha, I know," said George, "but he seemed too excited, I couldn't let him down."_

_Martha sighed. "At least set some ground rules, yeah? Don't let him make the same mistakes that Philip almost did when we had to come save him from his own past."_

_"Got it," he said, and they marched out._

_"Alright, Alex," Martha said. "Before we play with this game, we have to warn you: don't take it lightly."_

_"What do you mean?"_

_"Alex," George said, "do you believe in ghosts?"_

_The boy was taken aback by the question. He didn't outright answer which one, though. "I mean, lots of strange things are possible, right?"_

_"This game is meant to let others contact the spirit world," Martha explained. "But even then there are huge, dangerous risks to this, so please obey our ground rules, okay?"_

_"What are they?"_

_"First," George said, holding up a finger. "Do NOT ever play ALONE. That is an open invitation to some unrealized naiveté."_

_Alex nodded slowly. "Okay. What else?"_

_"Second, you need to SPECIFY, as MUCH as possible, what kind of ghosts you are trying to converse with here. If you're too vague, you could end up inviting some evil spirits in here. And it doesn't help that we're reincarnated either. You can run into haunting souls of your past lives."_

_He gasped. "I won't do that, promise. Anything else?"_

_Martha nodded. "Lastly, please remember to DISMISS the spirit you are talking to. They won't leave on their own. And you can't take your fingers off the board until you do, or you risk the chance of letting the spirit out. And, like we said, there are cruel spirits out there."_

_"Okay," said Alex. "Let's play!"_

_***_

_It was an accident, he swore._

_Alex had been putting the game away. He was carrying the board itself back to the basement where the box was. He, George, and Martha had spent many hours talking to old ghost versions of their friends from their first lives._

_"Man," he said, to no one in particular, "to think we can talk to just about anyone out there!"_

_And then the board shook, rattled, and flashed multicolor. Startled, he dropped the board._

_That's when the wisps surrounded him. Circling him furiously like a nest of angry bees. He cried an_ _d screamed for help. The voices started to speak - he heard Samuel Seabury's... Charles Lee's... Thomas Jefferson and James Madison's... Angelica Schuyler's... Maria and James Reynolds's... even Aaron himself._

_Although they were friends with him now (except Maria, who was wary, and J.R., cause screw that guy), he had ruined things for them in the past._

_"How does it feel to be refuted now?!"_

_"You will feel my pain..."_

_"I will stand by my sister. I hope you are satisfied."_

_"Why won't you stay?!"_

_"Money, or I talk."_

_"You've never been loyal..."_

_George and Martha came downstairs and found him on his knees, muttering apologies between begging them all to stop._

_"What happened?!" Martha cried out. "Did you play by yourself?!"_

_Alex looked up, his pupils were practically disappearing. "No..." he sobbed. "Honest... I just didn't watch my words, is all..."_

_George reached behind the armchair and found some tarot cards buried inside. He spread them out for a total of three: wood, fire, and wind, and began to speak:_

_"Be it here_

_Upon I call_

_Have no fear_

_None at all!_

_Let all the spirits be banished to_

_The cursed board they cometh through..."_

 

_Martha came over to George and held his hand. The spirits around Alex spun slower, and Martha joined in:_

_"Never to darken us again_

_Until the days they are summoned, then_

_We will be ready, prepared for worst_

_But we must complete this banishment first"_

 

_Alex stood and broke out of the circle. He staggered over to them and stood in between. The ghosts began to shriek but he managed to finish with something of his own anyway:_

_"By the power of 3_

_So mote it be!"_

 

_The ghost wisps were forced up into the air before being slammed back onto the board, getting sucked in by the glassy center._

_"Goodbye," Alex said firmly, as the last of them swirled in and they were safe once more. "You are dismissed." He turned to George and Martha. "I'm sorry, I was just trying to put it back and I mispoke. I shouldn't have made us play this game..."_

_Martha sighed. "Oh, you didn't know. But promise us you won't open the board again?"_

_Alex raised his right hand. "I promise."_

_George picked up the tarot cards. "I'll hold on to these. In case they get any ideas of stealing these from us."_

_And that was that._

_***_

"No one's touched it since," said Alex, as he nervously glanced around for any wisps. The chandelier was still floating and now the coffee table had joined it and was spinning wildly. He didn't realize he was crying until he touched his face in fear. "Until now. And now, with all you here, I fear it will be much worse."

Eliza shook. "What can we do?"

Alex sighed. "We can only hide. If we try and leave those wisps might cause us some actual damage." He stood up. "Come on, we're going to George and Martha's room. I'll just explain this to them when they come back."

"Whenever that is," Aaron added nervously, remembering that Wisp Lee had sent others to busy them.

As they headed through the house to the stairs, watching other things like vases and such fly, John was suddenly very fidgety. "Alex," he said, and Alex turned to look at him but kept moving, "I just wanted to let you know that I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have made fun of you being scared of this thing. I should have believed you."

" _We_ should have believed you," Aaron said, and Eliza added, "We're sorry too. Would you ever forgive us for how horrid we were acting?"

They reached the top of the steps and finally stopped in front of the Washingparents' room. "Already forgiven," Alex said with a small smile. "You didn't know, so it's fine." He opened the door to the room and was immediately knocked back onto the floor by its sudden slamming. There was cruel laughter on the other side of the door.

"Are you okay, Alex?! What was that?!" John asked, helping him up.

"Seabury," Alex replied bitterly, holding his nose. "More refutement revenge, I would assume."

Aaron opened the door this time, and it stayed open. All four of them cautiously walked into the room.

It was all still until the sound of metal could be heard from down below. All of them exchanged a worried look, immediately screaming when a ghost figure charged up through the floor. He was dressed in a soldier's uniform with a ring on his finger. Alex, John, and Eliza were completely confused, but Aaron was extremely shocked and terrified.

The man grabbed Aaron and hoisted him up by his shirt. He pointed a gun at him. "Theodosia was never yours! How dare you steal her from me!" Aaron shook and Alex yelled, "Oh shoot!" because he remembered way back when when Aaron had told him about this situation.

"How come she is still here, still alive, still here with me, and you are nothing, dead, a ghost of your former self!" Aaron shouted. He sounded more confident than he felt. "You can't truly hurt me. You are not canon, your threats are empty, they mean nothing!" Aaron jolted himself down and he slipped from the man's grip. He hissed and screeched before retreating out of the room.

"Dang, Aaron!" John said, amazed.

Aaron shrugged. "A little confidence can go a long way."

Eliza said, "well, at least we know how to fend them off until George and Martha are back," and then she looked up and saw a Maria wisp watching her smugly.

"Did he really love you?" she said, and waltzed her way over to Eliza, circling her slowly. "He didn't say no to me, he let this happen! If he loved you, do you think he'd really seek my company?"

Eliza shut her eyes. She was never the kind to grab the spotlight, so confidence did not come naturally. "You compelled him," ahe said softly. "He didn't know, didn't know..." All the while Alex watched her suffer in guilt and Aaron and John looked on worriedly, unable to interfere.

"He knew exactly what he was doing!" Maria shrieked. "Why do you think he didn't choose to go upstate?! He obviously had better things to be doing!" She yanked at Eliza's hair.

And that's when she turned on the fire.

"He had work to be doing, none of it concerning you," she hissed. She turned around and shoved Maria Wisp to the wall. The boys were absolutely shell shocked. "You, you, you!" She pointed an accusing finger. "The whore of a man who goes throwing her body at anyone willing to give her pleasure and piece of mind! No wonder he abuses you! What is there to love?!" A beat. Then, "I hope you burn."

As if on cue, eternal flames struck up inside of Maria and she screamed in inhumane terror before dissapating through the floor. It went quiet for a few moments... before the floor suddenly started covering itself in sharp icicles.

"Everyone on the bed!" John shouted, as several popped up near him. All four of them jumped onto the bed and clung to one another in terror as the door swung open revealing King George standing there. And behind him was an army that promised to be super terrifying.

He grinned. "You know what we do to traitors, don't you?" He pointed at them, then at us. "We send a fully armed batallion after them to remind them of our love!" 

He ducked, and four shots were fired. They didn't break flesh, but the unbearably inexplicable pain was back, and this time all four of them felt it.

"Stop!" Eliza cried out, through her forced tears. "Please..."

John's eyes were rolling into the back of his head. Alex and Aaron were threatening to keel over into the ice spikes. And King George the wisp was laughing so hard one might have called him insane.

Suddenly, he stopped. Even the army froze behind him. His face was suddenly twisted into a pained expression. The four of them looked on in pained confusion.

" _Banatio!_ " All the men disappeared, and George and Martha came charging in. The spikes lowered down so that they formed a clear path.

"Mom! Dad!" Alex cried, immediately jumping off to run into their arms. They looked at him in disappointment and pushed him away a bit.

"You promised us you wouldn't go near that game again," George said sternly. "Why did you open it again?"

Alex sniffled. "I'm sorry..."

"Wait!" Aaron said. "Don't blame him; he didn't even want to play. He tried to tell us not to, but we didn't listen."

"I was the one that opened it," John explained, "and I'm the reason those things escaped."

"But Aaron and I are just as much at fault, we played with him," said Eliza, "we're sorry, punish us if you must, but just leave Alex be. He wasn't involved in any of this."

George sighed, and pulled out the tarot cards. "Your honesty is appreciated. However, that doesn't change the fact that we have ghosts lying around." He glanced at the quartet. "As soon as we banish these things,  _please_ go find a better hiding spot for that thing. We've had enough dead man tales for a lifetime."

***

"What the hell?" James Reynolds said, three days later, when the four of them ran into him and Maria on the street. "Why are you giving me this?"

"Cause it's valuable," Aaron said, "people pay top dollar for these old things. And this one even lets you talk to other people."

James squinted. "So what, it's like some sort of game board phone?"

Eliza shrugged. "Basically. It's too much trouble for us, but maybe a smart person like you will figure it out."

He puffed out his chest. "Duh." He took the box from John, who was carrying it. "Thanks or whatever." He kept going, Maria following him and casting weird suspiscious glances at them as they walked.

"I can't believe we did that," said Eliza. "What if your parents find out?" she said to Alex.

Alex said, "he said  _we_ had enough stories for a lifetime. Besides, they don't even need to know that we gave it to them. For all they know, we buried it."

"And if the Reynoldses just so happen to have to answer for their sinful behavior..." John began.

Aaron finished it, "...that would be something short of a miracle."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My sister watches MBAV a lot, so by extension so do I :P


	3. One-Track Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "We knew he was non-stop, but enough to work himself into a stupor like this?!"
> 
> Alex, James, and John Jay have waaaay more essays to write, like 85 wasn't fucking enough already. It goes just as well as you would expect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New universe!
> 
> They are all in high school
> 
> Minor Lams and Jeffmads

"Come on, Alex, please," James begged, shaking the boy in question's shoulder. Alex turned his head up, glaring behind his reading glasses. "You out of all of us here actually need a break."

Alex didn't answer him, merely turned back to his writing. Instead, in the corner of their little writing room, Jay rolled his eyes. "Hey, if he wants to write himself to death, let him. Who's stopping him?" 

" _I am_ ," James hissed to him. "I don't want a repeat of first semester."

"Too late," snapped Jay. "It's already happening, slowly but surely."

Back in their first semester of their year at Betancourt High, they had a bitch of a principal, John Adams, running the show. He restricted everything, from their clothes to their voice to their lunch, and no one was standing for it anymore. But what could they do? They were only kids, and since when did adults listen to them?

They didn't... until mid-semester's annual board meeting.

Half of the staff from their school ran into the room disheveled and terrified. And the other schools' staff and the superintendent demanded to know what got them upset. And when they found out they understood.

85 essays entitled  _The Betancourt Papers_.

True, Jay gave up after writing only 5. Too weak minded. They weren't worried yet.

And then they found out that James wrote 29. And they actually flowed better and made more sense.

Did they even want to - ?

No, they insisted that did  _not_ want to see the rest.

Yet they did anyway.

Hell broke loose when they saw that Alexander wrote the other 51. The district had heard his arguments many a time, and knew that anything he wrote down was valuable and dangerous at the same time. 

It was worse when they saw the Schuyler Seal of Approval at the bottom of all of them. 

No one dared to defy that seal. If you saw it, it was local law.

Basically? They were screwed.

They let Adams go and Martha Washington took his place. Things had been better since then.

"You think John would find this acceptable?" James asked, arms crossed. Alex stiffened. So he was playing  _that_ card, was he? Two can play at that game.

"Yes," he replied, through gritted teeth. "If it takes an essay storm to free John and our other friends from Monroe then it will have been worth it."

Although many of the Hamilsquad attended Betancourt, some of them were put at the private school. In addition to John, the Schuyler sisters, Aaron, Theo, Laf and Sam were also attending Longfield. Alex, James, and Thomas would have been there too if they hadn't argued their way out of it.

James sighed. "Just take one break, please? Then I'll stop asking."

"Later," said Alex, softening a bit, turning back. James sighed again, and walked out of the room with Jay trailing him.

***

Alex did take a break, but not for very long, and only because he had to go to the bathroom. For the next few hours he didn't eat, and refused to sleep. He moved all his writing stuff to his room and stayed perfectly silent so he could fool James and Jay into thinking he was asleep. It worked for a while.

The next day, things went bad.

Jay came up to Alex's room door and knocked on it. "Yo, Alex, you've been asleep for 14 hours, man, come on out!" On the very, very few occasions that Alex agreed to some sleep, Jay and James left him alone until they believed a sufficient time had passed (in terms of Alex, that is).

He heard a groan from the other side and was instantly slightly worried. "Uh, can I come in?"

Nothing. He opened the door.

And screamed. 

Alex was lying on the floor in a half-assed fetal position. His hair was everywhere, a pen lay discarded by his right hand, and his left hand was clutching his stomach.

"Oh my fucking god," Jay said, before checking for a pulse. He retracted instantly. Barely there. " _James!_ " he yelled. "Get the fuck down here!"

"Why are you yelling?!" James asked, after running down some stairs. He poked his head into the room, paling when he saw Alex. "Oh my god! Is he alive?!"

Jay nodded. "Barely though! We have to get him to the hospital and fast!"

"Let me call Thomas," said James. Thomas only lived a few blocks down from the trio, with Maria and Hercules. "Get him to drive us."

"Let Laurens know too," Jay added. "He needs to talk some more sense into his boyfriend and he's the only one who can do it! I'll keep an eye on Alex."

James nodded, and stepped out into the hall. He called Thomas first.

"Are you okay, Maddie?" Thomas sounded concerned. "You never call me in the middle of important things unless there's an emergency." He was well aware of their essay assignment.

James suddenly started shaking. "No... It's Alex."

"What did he do this time?"

"He collapsed! He wouldn't take a break and I don't think he's eaten or slept since yesterday morning before we started this assignment!"

A gasp. "What?! Don't worry, I'll be down there ASAP!"

"Thank you, hon. Please hurry!" As soon as he hung up, Jay yelled from the room. "Alex's pulse is slowing a bit! Did you call him?!"

Breath hitch. "Yes! I just have to call John now. Get him outside and wait for Thomas! I'll be behind you!" Within seconds Jay ran past him, carrying Alex bridal style. He hurried after Jay just as John picked up on the second ring.

"Hello?"

"John, it's James! Alex is in trouble!"

"What did he do?!"

"He didn't eat or sleep for almost a whole day and now he's passed out! Will you meet us at the hospital?"

"Oh God, again?! Yes, I'll meet you there. Should I tell everyone else?"

"Yeah, he'll need all the support he can get right now."

James ran outside and saw Thomas in his little recreational van. Herc was in the front seat beside him, and when the doors opened, he saw Maria in the middle seat. Jay deposited Alex in the fourth row and sat right in front of him, in the third row. 

"We had to come," Maria said, when James sat beside her in the second row. "I can't believe he did this!"

"I know," Herc said miserably. "We knew he was non-stop, but enough to work himself into a stupor like this?!"

As they drove on, everyone grew increasingly worried. James was most worried in particular because of what John had said.

_What did he mean by "again"?_

***

"Oh dear," Catherine Schuyler said, when the group had come in with the unconscious Alex, "does he need his stomach pumped with food again?" 

Everyone's blood ran cold. "What do you mean 'again'?" Thomas asked fearfully.

"Oh, you didn't know?" she said incredulously. "A few months back, this exact situation happened, but John, Eliza, and Marshall were the ones who dragged him here. Aaron was here too, but it was for some infection that Theodosia picked up from a rare plant."

They all gasped. Catherine said, "it's a good thing you found him while you did! They almost missed him for a few days until they went to check."

***

With some strings pulled, all of them were permitted to be in the room with Alex at once. They waited an hour, watching the machine monotonously send food to Alex through the tubes in his nose, one long merciless hour, when John, Eliza, Marshall, and Aaron all finally came bursting through the door.

"How is he?!" John shouted, rushing to kneel on the floor by Alex's bed.

"He's holding up," Thomas sniffed. "They said he'll be all fine in a couple of hours."

James said, "why didn't you tell us that this happened before?"

"My mom told you?" Eliza said. She didn't sound angry, only worn out. "We just didn't want to go bothering you all. You were all so busy months ago."

Maria held Eliza's hand. "You guys are _never_ a bother, you hear? If anything like this happens again, call us, alright? We'll be there."

There was a noise from the bed, and everyone, sitting, standing and kneeling alike, turned to it. Alex's eyes were open, and the food had stopped supplying itself for now. He looked at everyone in the room and felt loved and regretful at the same time.

"Alex!" John cried out. He embraced him as tight as he could without hurting him or disrupting anything. "Please, baby, you can't scare us like that again!"

He managed a small smile. "Sorry," he managed weakly. Then he turned to James and Jay, who were sitting and standing, respectively, on the other side of him. "I should have listened to you. Look where being stubborn has gotten me."

"Being stubborn has gotten you through many animosities, great and small," Jay said, with a small smile of his own. "But sometimes you can slow down before it gets you into them as well."

He, John, and James helped Alex to sit up. "I love you all for being here for me," Alex said. "I'll try not to make you worry like this for me again."

Over the next few days, they finished up _The Longfield Pamphlet_ , a total of 99 pages.

Jay got more serious, James stayed about the same, and Alex slowed way down. They all wrote 33 pages between them.

Alex decided, that when they won the case, and both schools were celebrating, that taking a break every once in awhile and daily necessities would not kill him.


	4. The TJJ Intervention

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tench and Dolley have screwed things up with all the Thomases, Jameses, and Johns at least once.
> 
> They all decide to jump the two of them in a mass intervention.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oooooh, they're in trouble now

"Looks delicious, thanks Jay," said John Adams, taking the pastries. Beside him, John Marshall nodded in agreement. John Laurens was off to the side chatting with Adams' son, Quincy (which is what they called him to avoid further confusion).

Today, the Johns had taken it upon themselves to hang out at Hurricane Bakery, where John Jay was currently working. It was a slow day, so it was just them.

"John Bakery for the win!" Laurens said, pumping his fist in the air. Quincy laughed at this, as did Marshall, who was in earshot.

Suddenly a loud shout was heard from outside following a splat. A few seconds, then John Church marched into the room, drenched from hatted head to expensive shoe toe.

"Uh oh," Adams said. "What was it this time?"

Church sniffed himself, then said, "Chocolate shake mix," with a biting tone. Quincy and Jay moved slightly away from him; they weren't scared of Church, but they were deathly allergic to chocolate in any form.

"I'd be careful going out there if I were you," he added after a moment, attempting to squeeze his hat completely dry.

Adams checked his watch. "Oh shit! Quincy, we're going to be late for our meeting with Washington and Jefferson. I'd rather not upset them again."

"Hey! Last time wasn't even our fault; it was Dolley Payne's," Quincy said with a shrug. "Who did she think she was, slashing our tires like that?"

"I don't know," Adams replied, paying for his pastry and waving to the rest of the Johns before they left, "but we'd best hurry anyway."

They were out the door, and Laurens said, "I'll be right back, just heading to the bathroom."

As soon as he left, Church turned to Marshall and Jay. "Someone ought to teach Dolley a lesson, doing stuff like that," he said, putting his wrinkled hat back on his head. They nodded in agreement.

Laurens came back out moments later, drenched in water and soap. There were cuts and shiny white shards all over him. His hair was falling over his face, and he was making angry attempts to tame it.

"What happened?!" asked Church. 

He fixed them with a sharp glare. "Oh, someone thought it would be funny to have the sink completely explode. All the shards flew over me and the water sprayed out. Then the soap thing exploded too, so that explains all this." He sighed. "I've got to get home and clean myself off."

"Want anything before you go?" Jay asked, looking guilty.

Laurens waved a hand in dismissal. "Don't worry about it. Maybe next time?" Then he left the store.

The next two hours for the other Johns seemed to drag as they talked about their friends and their enemies, particularly Dolley who seemed to enjoy messing with them the most.

"Oh, my shift's over now," Jay said, sparing a glance to the clock. He punched out and headed for the back door, hoping to avoid Church's misfortune, motioning for him and Marshall to follow.

No such luck.

All three of them shouted as they were immediately doused in what they believed to be vanilla shake mix. Church started sneezing immediately.

"Good thing I'm only  _mildly_ allergic..." he said between sneezes and itching eyes.

"What the hell?!" Jay snapped, while Marshall offered Church some tissue and wrung out his hat for him. "Who's doing this?!" 

They heard snickering. They looked up, and Dolley's head poked out over the top of the one-story building.

"If it isn't - the devil - herself," Church attempted to say between sneezes.

"Why vanilla?" Jay asked. "Out of chocolate?"

Dolley gave him a strange look. "No? I know you're allergic to chocolate, so I switched it up. Don't need another hospital situation, eh? And yes, I'm aware that he's allergic to vanilla before you say anything," she said, holding up a hand before any of them could interject, "but I don't care because it can't kill him, and also fuck him, I don't really like him."

With that she disappeared. Church's phone went off then, and he scowled as he read the message received before melting into a look of worry. Adams and Quincy were in the hospital - cut brakes and they lost control - they would be fine, but it would take weeks. Then his face turned hard again and he turned to his fellow Johns in arms.

"Oh, this bitch is going to pay."

***

"Must you insist on inviting the sick gnome everywhere we go?" James Monroe said, arms crossed. James Reynolds could only shrug. James Wilkinson sat on the park bench beside them, shooting sympathetic looks to James Madison, who was under the old cherry tree sniffling, from tears and sickness alike.

Wilkinson turned to the other two. "You know you don't have to be so mean to him, yeah? And why do you talk about him like he's not here?"

Meanwhile, in another part of town, the Jameses were hanging about Hollendaise Park, ironically suggested by Maddie as their meeting place.

Monroe shrugged. "Cause it's fun? But in all seriousness, though, there's someone else that really needs to be talked about." He narrowed his eyes at Wilkinson. "Your roommate."

"Which one?" Wilk asked. "Don't you remember that I have two of them?"

"We're clearly not talking about that wussy Marshall," Rey snapped. "Too soft. We're talking about Tench, the devil incarnated."

Wilk raised an eyebrow. "I thought Frederick was the devil incarnated."

Rey widened his eyes before socking Wilk. "No! He's you-know-who, just like Dolley is the Witch! Do you pay attention at all during the nickname meetings?!"

"Clearly he doesn't," Monroe said, with a slow head shake. "I'm pretty sure _Madison_ paid more attention than he did."

"Considering he came up with the names..." Wilk said with an eye roll. He turned to the spot beside him and then made a face. "Uh, didn't we all have hats sitting here a moment ago?"

The other Jameses looked over to where he was looking. "Where'd they go?" asked Rey. "Strange..."

"Hey..." and they all looked to Madison, who was looking up with a strange face, pointing. One glance and they saw that their hats had all been alligned on the top branch of the tree: Rey's fedora, Madi's baseball cap, Wilk's beanie, and Monroe's visor - and, except for the visor, they all hung upside down. All of them were visibly confused.

"Now how the heck did they get up there without any of us noticing???" Rey said, squinting up. He stood up and walked over to the tree, with Wilk and Monroe eventually following after him. Madison stood up and kicked the tree, causing all the hats to fall... with nasty surprises.

All of them screeched as they has a taste of their own bouts of torture: Reynolds was covered in vomit (unsure if it was real or fake), Monroe grasped at his eyes due to itching powder, Madison was coughing and scratching over poison ivy rashes, and Wilkinson was covered in (nonpoisonous) ant bites.

An evil cackle rang out above them. They all looked up (except Monroe who was slightly blinded and didn't know where to look) and there was Tench Tilghman hanging off a particularly high branch.

He grinned down at them like a Chessy cat. "Messing with you lot is so easy! I need more of a challenge today." He made himself flip down off the tree before texting someone. Then he pocketed his phone and waved "Ta-ta!" with his fingers before running off.

Madison was the only one to speak after a few beats. "So... we can all agree that we want to kill him, right?"

The others nodded in grim agreement, then spent time grieving over their poor hats.

***

"TJeffs," said Thomas Paine, glancing over to the man in question, who was hiding behind a door in their office building, "what on earth do you think you're doing?"

Thomas Jefferson didn't look over from where he was standing. "Hiding," he answered.

"Why?" Thomas Conway stuck his head out from his own office only three doors down.

"Didn't they warn you? The Devil and the Witch are up to their old tricks," Jefferson replied. "We have to be on highest alert, considering there are less of us than them."

It was a few days after the previous incidents that the Thomases were all in the White House, now on their mandated intern break. Laurens and Madison had informed him of the events of their groups, immediately worrying him. As he said before, there were less of them than there were of the John group or the James group, so they were more susceptible to danger.

"Who do you think will do it?" asked Conway, coming into the room where the other two were.

"I think Dolley will do it," Paine said, from his place on the office couch. "She doesn't like me all that much since I accidentally ran over a new shirt of hers once."

Conway tilted his head. "Honestly, I think Tench will do it. The last person to send him to detention this year was me, so you know he's going to want revenge."

"What do you think, Jefferson?" asked Paine, noticing he hadn't moved from his spot.

He turned to face them, eyes tinged with worry. "With that logic, who's to say that they  _both_ won't come after us?"

Paine and Conway looked at each other in fear. Then Paine sprang up from the couch and ran to the door, pushing it shut and locking it before guiding Jefferson away from it. 

All was fine.

For now.

Then came an unexpected crackling sound. From  _everywhere._

Conway reached the desk, Paine the filing cabinet, and Jefferson under the very couch the other two were by before all three of them screeched out in horror.

Paine yelled first. "I can't see!"

Jefferson was next. "I'm a mess!"

Conway takes up a cry. "I don't think I've smelled anything so horrible!"

A flash bomb, paint bomb, and stink bomb, in that order, went off nearly destroying the office. The three of them were in hysterical tears as their miserable circumstances befell them.

"Oh my god, that was the best one yet!"

Conway and Jefferson looked out the window (Paine couldn't see) and saw Tench and Dolley outside, keeled over in laughter. They looked as if they were about to die laughing.

Oh, how they wished they would.

***

"Today was so productive!" Tench cried, taking a sip of the espresso in front of him.

"Right?" Dolley agreed. "Messing with the namers is so easy!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> John André is not in this because I just figured out about him. He will come later.


	5. #NewJerseyShore

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Phillip, Theo, Georges, and George pack up, skip school, and run off to New Jersey and the beach and malls and Carnival - and no one notices... yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Younger generation rocks!
> 
> When I write more for this universe, I need to decide who ends up with Phillip: Theo or George. Maybe both?
> 
> Also, I decided that Georges will be non-binary :D

"Phil, get up, man!"

Phillip Hamilton's head shot up from between his arms. Some of his curly hair was still stuck to his face, from falling from his already loose ponytail. He had fallen asleep in class again. But, luckily, class hadn't started yet. Mr. Washington was not yet there. Although, he vaguely remembered his father saying he wouldn't be in, so his class would be left with a sub.

He looked up and saw that George Eacker, one of his best friends, had waken him. It still shocked Phillip that he used to hate George because he made some joke about his father one time, which led to a huge fight in New Jersey that put Phillip in the hospital. Oddly enough, George had been the first one to come and send him well wishes, and also to apologize, along with their other friends, Theodosia Burr and Georges Lafayette. Phillip had waved it off, saying he shouldn't have overreacted as he did.

"What is it? I didn't miss class, right?" he asked sleepily, resting his head on his chin.

George shook his head. "Nah, you're good. We were looking for you."

"Me? Why?"

He grinned. "We have plans. Big plans."

That made Phillip raise his head all the way again. "Oh? Like what?"

George extended his hand. "You'll have to come with me and find out."

"I'm too tired to move..." Phillip mumbled, immediately shrieking when George lifted him from his seat. "Hey!"

"You said you were tired, so I'm moving you. Away we go!"

*****

"Ha ha, very funny," Phillip said, as George carried him into the library, towards their two best friends who were laughing at them. George set him down in the chair beside Georges before moving to sit cross legged beside Theo. "So what are these oh-so huge plans of yours?"

"We..." Georges held their hands in the air, pausing for dramatic effect. "...are going to New Jersey!"

Phillip shot George a look. "Haven't we already been there though?"

"Not for that reason!" George made a face. "We're going to hit all the beaches and the malls! Georges and I are already packed, we're gonna help you and Theo!"

"Aren't we going to get caught though??" Philip asked, eyes wide. "How are _you_ not freaking out about this?!" he added, turning to Theo.

Georges chuckled. "Because it was her idea!"

"Seriously??"

"Phil, you're acting like I didn't consider all of the circumstances before I thought of this," Theo said. "Does that sound like me?"

Phillip shook his head. Theo went on.

"Our dads are going to be out at Mount Vernon with Mr. Washington for some national meeting for a week. And your mom's going upstate with her dad and her sisters. Georges's parents aren't too worried about him, and George's are helping us fund this trip! Trust me, this plan is foolproof." 

Phillip raised his hands in surrender. "All right, that checks out. So are we going now?"

"Yep, my dad signed us out due to dire change in plans," George said. "Plus, we're seniors! That gives them a lot less reasons to worry about us. Let's go!"

*****

"Uh.... granary!" Phillip said, turning around.

Theo laughed, "that doesn't rhyme!"

"It is close," Georges said, shrugging, "try it anyway."

"The themes this game comes up with," George said, with a fond eye roll and his eyes locked on the road. "Like 'rhymes with cannery'. What the heck?"

The quartet were in George's old RV (he'd gotten it as a present and they used to take it camping when their parents were around), with George at the wheel and Phillip beside him. Theo was sitting in a little chair they'd installed on the side strapped in, and Georges was lying across the bed. All of them were currently engaged in a game of Fight List on Phillip's tablet which Theo was currently holding.

"Okay, that worked," Theo said, raising an eyebrow.

George shook his head, "I'm telling you, that game is weird!"

The RV hit a rock in the road and all four of them screamed.

"I hope this road levels out," Phillip said. "It's been quite bumpy."

***One Day Later***

Aaron rubbed his forehead with his index finger and thumb in annoyance. "This is why we tell you to talk less, Alexander. We may never be allowed back in there because of you."

"Whatever, Aaron," Alexander said with a pout.

Their little meeting had gone well until it was cut short by an unexpected brawl between William, Richard, and Alexander himself, a two-on-one of sorts. Needless to say, they were kicked out of their meeting place and forced to reschedule. In a month.

They'd reached their office when they saw Washington, who had left before them, sitting at the sensible couch in the far corner of the room.

"Sir," they said in unison. Washington stared at them both with a strange look on his face.

Aaron shifted uncomfortably. "Is there something wrong? You know, besides the whole spat at Mount Vernon." He winced when Alexander nudged him hard in the side.

"Are Phillip and Theodosia doing quite alright?"

The two men raised an eyebrow. 

"Uh, yeah? What do you mean?" Aaron asked.

"Did you see something off about them?" Alexander added. 

"That's just it," Washington said. "They weren't even here at school today."

Aaron's mouth hung open. "What?!"

Alexander crossed his arms. "You can't be serious."

"Phillip is usually early to my class. Before I get there, even. So when he wasn't there, I assumed something might have delayed him and that he would come late. But then class came and went, then 5th period came about and Theodosia never showed either, so I then assumed they went home sick or something because of what Principal Munroe said."

"What did he say?!" the men shouted in unison.

Washington raised an eyebrow but didn't think much of it. "They signed out early yesterday, them, Georges and Eacker. Said something about some dire change in plans."

"We have to track them down!" said Alexander, and then he and Aaron simultaneously whipped out their phones and headed to the iTracker App. Washington looked at them in amusement.

They both went furiously through before two beeps went off, and they stared at their phones, before looking at each other. Then they turned to Washington and shouted: "They're in New Jersey!"

*****

"Uh, how do you expect me to throw that ball at the bottles? You know I have bad aim," Phillip said with a scowl. "They don't exactly cover this subject in boarding school."

The four of them were now at Carnival, down by Jersey Shore, that they just happened to have arrived at right away (they didn't bother with hotels yesterday because George had the deluxe kind of RV), and while Theo and Georges were hanging out at the food court not too far from them, George was watching Phillip stare down the toss the bottle game in amusement.

"You could always play another game, you realize? And I thought your dad was working on improving your aim," George pointed out. "You really want to be here all day?"

Phillip sighed. "No... I'll just try." He covered his eyes with one hand. "Yahtzee!" he cried out, throwing the ball in his other hand as hard as he could.

He heard shattering and uncovered his eyes to see George staring in shock and the carny shaking in fear. He pointed at the prize rack and held up 4 fingers, still shaking quite a bit.

"Really?" Phillip walked slowly over to the booth, taking a large bear, snake, strongman, and pillow off the shelf. "Thanks! And I'm sorry," he added, handing the man some money, "use this to replace your bottles."

The carny gave them a small smile as he waved them off and they headed towards their friends. 

"Here." Phillip gave the snake to Georges and the pillow to Theo. "These are for you guys." He then turned to George. "Which one do you want?"

George reached for the bear and held onto it. Meanwhile Phillip detached the snap-on weight from the strong man and held it. 

"Whew, it's late," Theo said, looking at her phone. Then she pointed in the direction of the RV. "Let's hit the hay. We'll head out to Cinder Valley tomorrow and then head home. At least we'll beat our parents before they realize we're gone."

*****

 _"What do you mean they're in New Jersey?!"_ Eliza shouted through the phone.  _"And how do you mess up so badly to get yourself suspended from somehwere for a month?! You are really testing my patience thes_ _e days, Alexander!"_

Washington shot a side glance over to Alexander, who had his hand over his free ear with a painful grimance. "With all due respect, Elizabeth, I must ask that you keep your voice down a bit. I need to focus."

Behind them, Aaron snickered. 

 _"Aaron, you are in no position to be laughing at him,"_ Angelica hissed. _"You're quite literally in the same situation as he is."_ He stayed quiet.

The three men were in Washington's car, following the route given from Aaron's phone. Eliza had called while they were driving, and Alexander had somehow just blurted out the whole truth as the ride unfolded, in parts (first that their meeting had been rescheduled when she asked how it was going, and then Phillip and Theo's disappearances when she asked how  _they_ were doing).

"Betsey, I'm sorry," he said. "They must have left when we were still out at Mount Vernon. We're trying to track them down right now as we speak."

They heard Eliza sigh.  _"I suppose you're not entirely at fault. I mean, I wasn't there to keep him from sneaking off either. Just... find them, okay? I'm really worried now."_

"Us too, Eliza," Aaron said quietly but still loud enough to be heard. "We'll keep you posted." After she hung up, he put his head in his hands. "What were these children even thinking?"

*****

Phillip awoke to Theo and George's faces hovering far above his own. He yelped in surprise.

"What are you doing??" he asked, exasperated.

They rolled their eyes as if he should have known the answer. "We're here!" Theo said, pointing out the window, which Phillip couldn't see out of from his vantage point.

"Like I know what that's supposed to mean," he snapped grumpily. "Where is 'here'?"

"Duh! Cinder Valley!" George supplied, lifting Phillip to a sitting position. "Come on!"

After Phillip got ready, they led him out of the RV to where Georges was sitting on a bench some feet away. They grinned upon seeing the rest of them approach.

"I see Sleeping Beau is finally gracing us with his presence," they teased. Phillip playfully swatted at their arm. "What are we waiting for? Let us go in."

Hours later, they were all exiting the store, laughing and talking about how they had to go out and do this again... until Georges looked up and widened their eyes in terror. No one else noticed until two voices pierced the air.

_"Theodosia Alston Burr!"_

_"Phillip James Hamilton!"_

All four of them froze and looked up. Washington stood tall, as usual, with his arms crossed, looking stern. And on either side of him, Theo and Phillip saw the furious gazes of their fathers. George and Georges were shaking but not as hard as them. For a while, no one said anything.

"Daddy?" Theo was the one to break the silence. "I thought you were away at Mount Vernon..."

Aaron rolled his eyes. "We were. But what made you think it was okay to skip school and leave the state?!" He pointed at Phillip who cringed back. "I bet this was your idea, wasn't it?!"

"Hey! Don't blame my boy!" Alexander snapped. "It was probably George's fault! You know how troublesome he is."

George startled for a second before answering. "It's not nice to make assumptions! For once, I'm innocent here!"

Theo looked to Georges worriedly, who gave her an equally shocked face in return before throwing their hands in the air in exasperation at this. She'd rather come clean than let her friends take the fall. She sighed. "Don't blame them, it's not their fault... it's mine, okay?"

Washington, Aaron, and Alexander stopped yelling to face all of them for a second. "You?" Aaron said, after a few beats of silence. "No way. You're just covering for them."

"No, I'm not, Daddy," she said, shaking her head. "This was my idea."

"She is not lying," Georges added, "but let it be known that she did not trick any of us into coming here. We all followed her of our own will."

Phillip and George nodded wordlessly. No one spoke, and then Aaron and Alexander wordlessly grabbed their children's hands and dragged them off. The other two followed with Washington behind them.

Long story short: they were all grounded. 

Next time, they had to plan better for a certain immigrant... next month.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made Theo's middle name Alston for the sake of giving her one.


	19. Dear James, Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Did the shyest boy in class write a love letter to one of his classmates?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Based off a Mini Mysteries (from American Girl) chapter. It's called "Love Letters".
> 
> So because of this, all of them are kids here!
> 
> Any time this AU happens, Alex will usually solve the mystery (there is one instance where John will instead).
> 
> If you ever read the books, you'll know the mysteries. Here is who I subbed for who:
> 
> Alex is Marie  
> John is Noelle  
> Thomas is Hailey  
> Laf is Sage  
> Herc is Hope  
> Angelica is Megan  
> James is Rebecca  
> Eliza is Brooke  
> Peggy is Rose  
> Aaron is Faith  
> George is Ms. Toone  
> Maria is Ben  
> Charles is Russell  
> Sam is Nate  
> Theo is Matt
> 
> Marshall, Benjamin, Jonathan, Wilkinson, and Tench are Hailey's sisters  
> Martha Manning is Chris (Marie's little brother)
> 
> I will, unlike the story, answer the riddle on the next chapter as a continuation instead of making you wait for it (ha, ha) unless you would prefer to guess.

James Madison was smart.

He could name all 43 presidents within seconds. He was district spelling bee champ twice in a row. And it wasn't uncommon for James to correct Mr. Washington when he made a mistake in social studies.

But when James wasn't answering questions, he was quiet. James was the shyest kid in class.

So when Eliza found, blown against a bush on the playground, the love letter from James to Theo, everyone was surprised.

"Well, I'd never believe it if I didn't see it myself," said Herc. "Shy James has a girlfriend!"

"At least he has good taste," said Laf.

"Speak for yourself," Aaron said. "Theo shows off more than anyone I've ever seen. It's annoying."

Thomas grabbed the note and read it out loud:

 

> _Dear Theo,_
> 
> _I hope your not embarased to recieve this letter,_
> 
> _but I like you very much._
> 
> _your a very nice person and I'm glad we got to be partners_
> 
> _for our science expirement._
> 
> _Now I hope we can be friends._
> 
> _Love, James_

_"_ How sweet!" He held the note to his chest and fluttered his eyelashes.

"Do you think she likes him back?" Herc asked.

"Don't see why she wouldn't." It was John's turn to get his two cents in. "He's smart, and he's got a nice smile when he's not hiding it."

"Can I see that note?" Alex asked, and he took the note from Thomas.

"I can't wait to tell everyone that James likes Theo," Eliza began to sing.

"I don't think we should be spreading this all over," said John. "I don't think James wanted anyone to read this note."

Alex spoke up again. "There's an even better reason we shouldn't be spreading this around class." The group turned to him in confusion. "This might be a real note from James to Theo, but it's not from  _our_ James."

 

_How did Alex know? Love to find out what Alex knows? Keep reading!_


	20. Dear James, Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What did Alexander know?

"What?" Eliza said. "Why do you think that?"

Alex held up the note. "I don't think, I know. Look at this again. Do you really think that our two-time speller champ James would misspell anything?"

"No?" Thomas said. "He's the two time champ for a reason."

"Yes, he is. But there are three things misspelled in this note." He handed the note to John, who looked over it.

John said, "he's right. Look - 'your' instead of 'you're', 'embarased' instead of 'embarrassed', and 'expirement' instead of 'experiment'." He passed the notes to the others so they could see it themselves. "This is definitely not our James."


	21. Sweet Peggy, Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why would Peggy leave a private photo in a library book for all to see? That's what she wants to know!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More Mini Mysteries! This one is based on "Sweet Rose".
> 
> Read Chapter 19's notes to know who subs for who.
> 
> Adrienne is Samuel (for reference). Harriet Putter has been swapped out for Common Sense.

"Look what I found!" Eliza marched into the classroom holding a photo over her head.

It was lunchtime. Normally they would be outside after that, but there was a blizzard blowing. The principal had given the students three choices: play in the gym, read in the library, or stay quietly in their homerooms. Alex, John, and Peggy all decided to stay in, decorating a bulletin board for Mr. Washington.

"Let me guess," Peggy said without turning around. "It's a picture of your lovey-dovey boyfriend."

Eliza said, "oh, sooooo close. It's a picture of  _your_ lovey-dovey _girl_ friend. And I quote from the back of the photo — " she turned it over to read aloud — "'Roses are red, violets are blue, You are sweet and kind, too. Love, Adrienne'."

Peggy screamed, dove over a desk, and grabbed the photo from her hand. "Where did you get this?!"

"I found it," said Eliza.

"Yeah, you found it, in my desk," said Peggy, face a-flushing.

Eliza smiled. "Did not. It was in the library, in a book."

"It was in my desk!"

"No, really, I found it in a library book. It was in a copy of  _Common Sense_ that had just come in. It was between pages 99 and 100."

John raised an eyebrow. "Between 99 and 100? You remember the exact page numbers?"

"Yeah," said Eliza. "Funny, huh. I thought it was interesting that it was there and that's why I remembered them."

"What would my picture be doing in a library book?" asked Peggy, crossing her arms. 

"Dunno." Eliza shrugged. "Maybe somebody else took it and hid it there. Or, since you just finished reading  _Common Sense_ , maybe you left it. I can see it now — " here Eliza took the picture back from Peggy to illustrate her point — "you read a page, you look at Adrienne, you read a page, you look at Adrienne — ah, romance. Peggy has one true love."

"She's not my _one_ true love." Peggy stomped her foot.

 _Teasing time,_ thought Eliza. "Oh, you have more than one true love?"

Peggy shook her head. "I don't have  _any_ true loves," she clarified. "She's just a friend."

"A friend who signs with 'love'?" questioned Eliza. "It's okay, Peggy. You can have a true love. We understand. You were reading with the photo, you forgot to take it out, and you returned the book. Simple. Case closed."

Alex stepped up to Eliza and held out his hand. "Case closed, all right," he said, as Eliza dropped it into his palm. "Stop teasing Peggy and come clean. You took the picture, and that's why you're lying to her about where you got it."

 

_How did Alex know Eliza was lying? Picture the answer, then read on!_


	22. Sweet Peggy, Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How did Alex know that Eliza was lying?

"I don't know what you mean," said Eliza, who stood looking nonchalant.

John held out a copy of  _Common Sense_ , flipped out to page 99, which was on the right side of the page, as odd numbers tended to go. "Look, here's page 99." 

Then he turned the page to 100, which was on the left as evens go, and said, "and here's page 100. You can't hide anything between those pages because there is nothing to hide it behind."

Eliza sighed, looking at the three in the room. "Fine, I took it, okay? But I was just teasing. You have to mellow out!"


End file.
